Notes on Gender Role Transition

By Anne Vitale Ph.D.

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Resources for Friends and Families

Here is a list of resources for parents who are transgendered, parents of transgendered persons, and children of transgendered persons.

Online Support Groups

Significant Other Support Group for the wives of Crossdressers. Contact Julie (925) 937-8432

Chi Upsilon Iota Tri-Ess Champaign/Urbana IL

We are a newly forming chapter of TRI-ESS. Tri-Ess is an educational, social and support group for heterosexual crossdressers, their spouses or partners and their families. We support both crossdressers and their spouses. We believe that we are blessed with an additional facet to our personalities. If we accept our crossgendered side, and explore it, we will find a broadening of the entire personality, which can be very fulfilling. We dress in emulation, rather than in mockery, of femininity.

Tgs-pflag-- This a self described "warm and fuzzy" support group on-line for parents, spouses, family members, and friends of anyone who defines him or herself as transgendered. In addition, there are many transgendered (FTM/MTF/CD/"Other") persons on the list. To sign up, send message: "subscribe tgs-pflag <your mail address> to


Parents of TransKids -- This list is designed particularly for parents of young (minor) children who believe they are transgendered or transsexual. To subscribe or to get further information email


DialUp -- For children of transsexual or transgendered parents. For further information or to subscribe contact


Adult Children of Transsexual Parents -- For children over 21. For information or to subscribe contact


Kids of Gays -- Despite its name, this group, sponsored by COLAGE (Children of Lesbian and Gay Men Everywhere) explicitly welcomes children of transgendered persons. They have an email list, a web site, and an office in San Francisco. To reach them by email, write


TSParents-- Primarily for parents who are themselves MTFs or FTMs; some exceptions granted. Send plain-English subscription or information request to



AMERICAN BOYZ -- Primarily a FTM site. A special effort has been made to include resources for transgendered persons and SOFFAs who also belong to other minorities.


National SOFFAs Resource List -- Although the emphasis of the list is on resources for SOFFAs of FTMs, it includes many resources -- particularly for parents and children of transgendered persons -- that are particularly germane to family members of MTFs. The home page for this site, at ftmsofaq, also contains questions and answers specifically for the SOFFA perspective.


SOFFA USA -- contains many resources and links for all types of SOFFAs including SOFFAs of MTFs.


PFLAG-talk/tgs-pflag-- website has many resources for family members and partners of transgendered persons divided into categories such as "support," "education," "advocacy." PFLAG Acts," etc...


Transfamily of Cleveland -- Includes resources for family members and partners of transgendered persons: newsletters, lots of links, a book list, a link to the HBIGDA Standards of Care, organizations serving transgendered persons, a link to transgendered legal issues, etc.


Transsexualism FAQ for Significant Others, Friends, Families and Allies-- Trans 101 written with SOFFAs in mind. Also contains a set of links.


COLAGE--Children of Lesbian and Gay Men Everywhere. Despite their name, all of their materials invite children of transgendered persons. Indeed they have a page specifically for children of transgendered parents.


Family Pride Coalition -- (Formerly Gay and Lesbian Parents Coalition International) now include transgendered parents in its mission statement.


ISNA -- The Intersex Society of North America; P.O. Box 3070, Ann Arbor, MI 48106-3070, provides support to intersex persons. Their web site contains links and resources for SOFFAs, particularly parents.