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A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

August 2013
Posted here by permission on January 26, 2017


I have the upmost admiration for those wives and partners who with compassion and understanding accept their husband's transsexualism/transgenderism. We all know these women; they are the ones that scare significant others, particularly those new to crossdressing, for they are venturing into that part of genderland that most of us are unwilling and reluctant to go. They are the ladies that appear on panels or talk shows with "husbands" now living FULL TIME as women, some having had surgery (post-op transsexuals), others not (pre-op transsexuals or transgenderists).
These are the wives who have made the decision to let their families and friends know that their lives are now going to be quite different. Once a couple, now two ladies. If there are children involved, they will need to deal with the strong emotions and intense feelings as the children begin to realize that Dad as they have known him is gone. Explanations will need to be made to family members and questions answered.
There will be times when the wife will have to depend on her inner strength to help her through those times when she misses her "husband" the most.
Invariably careers are affected as colleagues, managers, co-workers, etc., must be apprised of her husband's decision. Many wives know that their income may well be affected as society differs in its ability to accept "changes" on the job and not all transitions work smoothly and without difficulty.
Those of us who accept our husband's crossdressing for the most part have not had to deal with our husband's wanting to live FULL TIME as a woman. We still have our husbands most of the time and deal with crossdressing issues on a part-time basis so to speak. We have learned the art of compromise whereas in the relationships I have described the wife is the one who is doing ALL the giving and the husband who is doing ALL the taking.
However, most husbands who make this decision to go full time do so only after much soul-searching and self-examination. We hope they are doing so because they believe it is their only choice, the only way they can hope to attain some degree of peace in their lives. Because their wives believe this also, it is why they have come to accept these decisions with equanimity. We hope they also have peace and serenity in their lives. They deserve it!

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