index-of-articles

Significant Other View Index of Articles

Notes on Gender Role Transition
A Significant Other View
By Julie Freeman

Updated February 10, 201
Julie Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser and she has been active in the gender community for thirty years, particularlywith significant others and couples groups. Julie has contributed to many gender newsletters and magazines over the years and currently writes articles on gender issues for the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter, Devil Woman. Many of her articles deal with the effects crossdressing has on relationships with husbands, families, friends, and life in general. Julie also belongs to an on-line support group for wives and partners of transgendered. Juliie can be reached at julie39@comcast.net.

 

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Ups and Downs

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Ups and Downs

For most of us, when we are presented with something different or unusual, it takes a period of time to adjust. We may feel that the normal situation is for one to start out skeptical or even negative and then as time goes on slowly adjust and eventually if all goes well become very positive. Sort of like a diet. We may start out with a goal of losing 25 pounds and according to the diet charts, we should see a steady decline of perhaps two lbs. per week. Right? Wrong!!

We all know that in spite of good intentions and stringent dietary habits, those pounds do not disappear at a steady rate. Rather we experience ups and downs. One week we may lose the two lbs. if we are lucky. Then the next week, instead of losing, we gai...
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Another Closet

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman
This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Another Closet

Once the crossdresser has come out of the closet, so to speak, to his significant other, many significant others report that they now are walking into a closet - a closet called SECRET.

The burden of secrecy, significant others say, has shifted. The secret kept so many years by the crossdresser (fearing he might lose his family, friends, etc.) now is OUT. The significant other now feels the burden (fearing she might lose family, friends, etc.)

The secret permeates her life! Does she tell her friends? Does she tell her co-workers? What about the children? What about parents, aunts and uncles? And let us not forget the neighbors, of course. Should she see a helping professional to make sense out of this? And where can she find a helping professional who has know...
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Good Will

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Good Will

During my break between classes, I had a chance to clean house. It had been several months since I had seen the bottom of my closet so I pulled out all the shoes I hardly ever wore (the ones I wore on a consistent basis were found by the bed), layered on top of each other, vacuumed the bottom of said closet and proceeded to sort the shoes and put back in a tidier manner. I soon realized why I had so many layers. There were so many old, decrepit shoes that I decided it was now or never. Into the Good Will bag, the sooner the better. In our house, nothing is thrown out. Every item of clothing, no matter how ragged, gets recycled although I have my doubts that anyone would ever choose such items. From my experience, even the poorest student I know somehow manages to buy designer shoes...
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Co-Dependency

A Significant Other View
by Julie Freeman

This article is reprinted here with permission from DEVIL WOMAN, the Diablo Valley Girls newsletter. Ms Freeman is the wife of a crossdresser. She can be reached at Julie39@comcast.net

Co-Dependency

One of the buzz words we hear all the time these days is "co-dependent" closely following the heels of those other catchy phrases "enablers" or "dysfunctional." It is no wonder that psychiatrists' phones are ringing off the hook and chat rooms are bursting at the seams as individuals worry that they may be "enablers" or "co-dependents" in their relationships with others.

This worry has certainly not escaped the world of the significant other fearful that by maintaining a relationship with a crossdresser she is either "enabling" his behavior or is a "co-dependent" by remaining in a relationship with him. This reminds me of a book written in 1976 by Deborah Feinbloom, TRANSSEXUALS AND TRANSVE...
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